When Survival Shows Up: Recognizing Your Trauma Responses
When Survival Shows Up
Fight. Flight. Freeze. Fawn. Collapse.
Your trauma responses are not who you are—they're how you've survived. Let’s explore them with care, and build safety as we heal.
Understanding the Ways Our Bodies and Brains Try to Protect Us
By Nutbrown Counselling
When something overwhelming, frightening, or deeply upsetting happens, our bodies and minds react—even if we don’t realize it in the moment. These reactions are called trauma responses, and they’re your nervous system’s way of trying to protect you from harm.
You might have heard of the fight-or-flight response, but that’s just one piece of the picture. Trauma responses can look very different from person to person, and many are quiet, hidden, or misunderstood—even by those experiencing them.
Let’s explore what trauma responses are, why they happen, and how understanding them can support healing.
What Is a Trauma Response?
A trauma response is any automatic survival reaction that kicks in when your brain perceives danger—especially when you feel helpless, trapped, or overwhelmed. This can happen during a traumatic event or even long after, when something reminds your nervous system of the past.
These responses are not choices or flaws in personality. They are deeply wired survival strategies. And while they may not always feel helpful in the present, they once served a purpose—often during a time when there were few other options.
The Big 5 Trauma Responses
While most people have heard of fight and flight, there are several common trauma responses:
1. Fight
You feel the urge to confront, defend, or push back.
You might feel angry, irritable, or out of control.
This response tries to protect you through power and boundary-setting.
2. Flight
You feel the need to escape—physically or mentally.
You might overwork, avoid, become anxious, or have racing thoughts.
This response protects through movement, distraction, or planning.
3. Freeze
You feel stuck, disconnected, or emotionally numb.
You might dissociate, go blank, or struggle to speak or move.
Freeze is the body’s way of playing dead—protecting by shutting down.
4. Fawn
You try to appease or please to stay safe.
You might suppress your needs, agree quickly, or avoid conflict at all costs.
This response is common in people who grew up with unpredictable or unsafe caregiving.
5. Collapse/Submit
A lesser-known response where the body shuts down further—surrendering or giving up in the face of powerlessness.
It may show up as deep shame, helplessness, or hopelessness.
Why Do Trauma Responses Happen?
Your nervous system is constantly scanning for danger—even without your conscious awareness. When it senses a threat (real or perceived), it activates one of these responses to keep you alive.
This system is incredibly adaptive, especially during trauma or childhood experiences where you didn’t have control. But later in life, these same responses can feel confusing, shameful, or even out of place.
Understanding them helps you realize:
✨ “I’m not broken—this is my body trying to protect me.”
The Role of Safety and Stabilization
Before processing trauma or making big emotional shifts, it’s essential to build safety and stabilization—both internally and within your relationships.
This phase of healing supports you in:
Feeling grounded in the present moment
Learning how to regulate intense emotions or dissociation
Strengthening your sense of control and choice
Creating internal and external conditions that feel safe
Stabilization techniques may include grounding exercises, breathing practices, safe place imagery, boundary setting, and developing supportive routines. These tools aren’t just “prep work”—they’re essential for nervous system regulation and building trust with yourself.
When your body feels safe, it can begin to shift out of survival mode and into healing.
When Trauma Responses Keep Showing Up
Sometimes, the danger has passed—but your nervous system doesn’t realize that. Trauma responses may keep activating in everyday situations like:
Conflict with a partner or friend
Receiving criticism
Medical appointments or physical touch
Work stress or deadlines
Feeling trapped, seen, or out of control
If you’ve ever thought, “Why am I reacting so strongly?”—you’re not alone. These are not overreactions. They’re signs your system is still on guard.
You Can’t “Think” Your Way Out of a Trauma Response
One of the hardest parts of healing is realizing that trauma responses are not fully cognitive. You may know you’re safe now—but your body still remembers.
That’s why healing often involves body-based tools, grounding practices, nervous system regulation, and compassionate support—not just talk therapy or logic.
Moving Toward Healing
The good news? Your nervous system is capable of healing—especially when safety, curiosity, and patience are part of the process.
You might begin by:
Learning to notice and name your trauma responses
Practising grounding and self-regulation skills
Setting boundaries that honour your needs
Gently exploring trauma work with a trained professional
Celebrating your nervous system for keeping you going
Healing doesn’t mean the past didn’t matter. It means you’re learning to respond from the present—not live from the past.
Warmly,
Nutbrown Counselling
In-person & virtual counselling in Kelowna, BC
🌐 www.nutbrowncounselling.com
📅 Book a Session
Disclaimer
The content of this blog is for informational and educational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical, psychological, or mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of a qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a mental health condition.
Nutbrown Counselling is a Canadian counselling practice offering services within the counsellor’s professional scope and jurisdiction. Any use of the information in this post is at your own discretion and risk.References
Levine, P. A. (2010). In an unspoken voice: How the body releases trauma and restores goodness. North Atlantic Books.
van der Kolk, B. A. (2014). The body keeps the score: Brain, mind, and body in the healing of trauma. Penguin Books.
Walker, P. (2013). Complex PTSD: From surviving to thriving. Azure Coyote Publishing.
Ogden, P., & Fisher, J. (2015). Sensorimotor psychotherapy: Interventions for trauma and attachment. W. W. Norton & Company.
Steele, K., Boon, S., & van der Hart, O. (2017). Treating trauma-related dissociation: A practical, integrative approach. W. W. Norton & Company.